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Josh turned over another plastic toy is his hand and decided
to sleep on whether he could bear to part with it. In the
morning, it was still there, proudly on top of the pile like a
Christmas tree star - a shining token from a boy who couldn’t
quite grasp the meaning of his gifts.
What he did understand was that his toys would go to children
not unlike him. They had also lost their dads.
To deliver the toys, Josh travelled with his mom to Uganda.
Despite the stark differences in culture and language, Josh and
his mom used their own loss to connect deeply with the women and
children in the village of Ndejje and created a bond that would
last longer than the toys, balloons and chewing gum they had
brought. Erin Cassidy was married to Paul for two years when she
became pregnant with their first child. Three months later, they
discovered Paul had bowel cancer. As Erin gave life to her son,
she watched her husband die. Only five months after Josh entered
the world, Paul left it. Erin was alone with her infant and
Paul’s seven-year old daughter. The world, it seemed, would
never spin in the same direction again. Four years on, Erin was
working as the office manager for Global Volunteer Network. She
watched hundreds of people sign up to volunteer their time and
often thought about volunteering herself. There was one
particular program on her mind: the Widows’ Empowerment Project
in Uganda.
When Erin made an off-hand remark to a friend at church about
the project, he told her to book the flight and bill it to him.
When she realized he was serious, she did just that, but she
didn’t go alone; she took Josh too. ‘I wanted to show him that
even though we think we don’t have a lot, we have more than
others can only dream of,’ she said. As for Erin, the trip was a
sort of homecoming in a foreign land, where she could offer her
knowledge of sorrow for others to lean on.
‘I was aware of what I was dealing with,’ she said. ‘Most of the
women in the Widows’ Empowerment lost their husbands to AIDS and
watched their spouses waste away too.’ AIDS has devastated
Uganda. In 2003, there were 530,000 adults living with HIV/AIDS,
and 2.2 million orphans in a population of 24 million who had
lost one or both parents to the disease. The strain this has
created on communities is hard to bear. As the husband is the
traditional breadwinner in Ugandan families, his death often
leaves the family in financial crisis. The Widows’ Empowerment
project gives women choices about their financial future and
provides relief from making difficult choices between food and
education, water and medicine. The project was started by a
local organization in Ndejje, and with the help of Global
Volunteer Network, employs international volunteers to help
teach mothers and widows practical skills to earn a living.
For Erin and Josh, that meant helping to build pens for women to
raise pigs and sell for profit. ‘I know how hard it was, and
still is at times, for me and the children,’ Erin said. ‘And I
had the assistance of social welfare, friends, people at church
and other support organizations. I also remember I did not want
to accept anyone’s help. And yet here were these very proud
women being so gracious. I’m ashamed to say that I probably
wasn’t as gracious in accepting help on the scale that I
received. It was very humbling.’
The decision to take Josh to Uganda wasn’t easy. But in the end,
Erin knew that she couldn’t go without him.
‘Josh and I talked a lot before we left,’ Erin said. ‘We looked
at photos and talked about what it means to not have a daddy. He
had a lot of knowledge for a five-year-old.’ As much as she
prepared Josh for the trip, she couldn’t always put her own mind
at ease.
‘I didn’t know a lot about AIDS before I went,’ Erin said. ‘I
knew that a lot of the kids he would be playing with would have
AIDS. I got a bit paranoid thinking, ‘What if he falls over and
cuts himself while he is playing?’ That was my biggest worry.
But I don’t think it even entered my mind once we were there.’
In his interview, Josh repeatedly said how sad he was for the
children.
‘The saddest thing was that the kids had no parents, and no
grandad or grandma.’
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One afternoon, he met an orphaned boy with Down’s syndrome in
tattered clothing. Josh gave him his shirt in exchange for his
ratty one. It’s a story Erin’s told before, but she still cries
with its retelling.
And it isn’t the only story that makes Erin emotional. There are
faces she can still remember…
The Ripples of Difference FREE e-book is a collection of unique
and powerful stories written by volunteers from around the
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hope to those in need around the world!
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